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Warrior cats hunger games season 1/Episode 1
Contestant introductions (Featuring Rainy and Spotty ) Poppyfrost: Welcome to Warriors Hunger Games! This is your host, Poppyfrost. This year we have mostly contestants from ThunderClan and ShadowClan, but we have one special contestant: Ashfoot! Everyone but Ashfoot: Hey, we're special! Poppyfrost: I know, but she's from a different Clan than you guys. Ashfoot: Oh, so now you're being racist? Poppyfrost: No, I... OK, fine. (Ashfoot throws rocks at Poppyfrost) Dovewing: Hey, good idea! (throws more rocks at Poppyfrost) (Now everyone's throwing rocks at Poppyfrost) Cinderheart: MACARONI!!!!!!!!! (throws macaroni at Poppyfrost) (The camera man, Berrynose, drops the camera to run and help Poppyfrost) (HG people come to take Cinderheart's macaroni) HG person: I'm sorry, Mrs. Heart- Cinderheart: I'M NOT MARRIED TO LIONBLAZE!!!!!!!! Yet.... (evilly laughs) HG person: Okay... Miss Heart Cinderheart: NU! CINDERHEART! (slaps HG person) HG person: Why didn't you say that first...? Anyway, sorry, Cinderheart, we're going to have to confiscate the macaroni. No food or weapons from your Clan. Macaroni can be qualified as both. Cinderheart: Oh, no, this is from the Cornucopia. And macaroni is a weapon? HG person: IT'S FROM THE... THAT'S EVEN WORSE! (looks in box) Stanley, get a new box of grenade macaroni. Cinderheart: (hidiously screeches jingle form Grenade Macaroni ad) GRENADE MACARONI!!!!!!!! IT'S GRENADES MADE FROM MACARONI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EVERYONE LOVES IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE IT YOU LOVE IT AND IT TASTES LIKE GRAPES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Poppyfrost explodes) Berrynose: NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!! I QUIT! HG person: Stanley, get the backup camera person and host while Poppyfrost gets surgery and I convince Berrynose to come back. We'll be right back after this... um... ad break! (grenade macaroni ad) Rainy: We're back and I am your guest host, Rainy! Hopefully nobody will throw rocks at me. Anyway, let's introduce our contestants. First off we have Cinderheart. Anything you'd like to say? Cinderheart: THEY LET ME HAVE THE BOX AND IMMA STUFF LIONBLAZE IN IT AND FORCE HIM TO BE MY MATE. Rainy: I thought you left Lionblaze and he was depressed about you... Cinderheart: I'M NOT DEPRESSED, I'M JUST A PSYCHO. AND I HAVE INNACCURATE WRITERS. Rainy: O...kay then. (presses buzzer under desk thingy) (HG people come) HG person: Maybe we should confiscate that box. Cinderheart: NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!! MY BOX. (HG people tackle Cinderheart and steal her Grenade Macaroni box) Rainy: O...kay. (sighs with relief) Onto the next contestant, Dovewing! Anything you'd like to say? Dovewing: I'm not going to win... I'll be able to hear everyone, but not fight them. Especially Tigerheart. Rainy: And you just gave away two secrets in one line! Dovewing: crap. Rainy: Lol. Anyway, next is Graystripe. Anything to say to the public? Graystripe: nope. Rainy: That's kind of a retorical question. Graystripe: okay then. Briarlight, Blossomfall, if I don't win, tell Millie I love her. I guess. Rainy: Okay then. Next, Mapleshade. Anything you'd like to say? Mapleshade: I WILL KILL YOU ALL! >:D Rainy: O...kay. You seem... confident. Next up, Hawkfrost... POPPYFROST DIDN'T MENTION A RIVERCLAN CAT. (cut to Poppyfrost being sewn back together, holding up a card saying "I forgot, sorry.") Hawkfrost: Poppyfrost will pay for forgetting me... (eyes glow) Rainy: Heh heh... okay. Next is Bluestar. Bluestar: DISCO!!!!!!!!! Rainy: You're not still on that from If Firestar turned evil, are you? Bluestar: On what, catmint? DISCOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! Rainy: I suppose so. Bluestar: Okay then, yes I am. DISCO!!!!!!!! Rainy: alright then. Ivypool, what do you want to say? Ivypool: SCREW YOU HAWKFROST!!!!!!!!!!! I LIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BECAUSE YOU LIED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND NOW I'LL KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Hawkfrost throws a rock at Ivypool) Rainy: I think that's illegal. But whatever. Ferncloud? Ferncloud: I... don't.... fight. (whimpers in fear) Rainy: Very nice. Ha ha, get it? Very nice? You don't fight? Nobody gets my jokes. (cries) Heh... heh... time for another.... ad break! Sandstorm: I like walnuts! Random voice: TRANSITION! Rainy: sorry about this. We're back! Now for Hollyleaf. Hollyleaf: Great, now I have to kill Ashfur again. (You can Spotty's voice for miles around screaming HOLLYLEAF ISH BEST CAT!!!!!!!!) Rainy: very nice. Now Ashfur. Anything to say to contradict Hollyleaf? Ashfur: Yeah right. I'M the evil one here. Hollyleaf: Not according to fanbase. (shoves laptop in front of Ashfur) Ashfur: What's this? Hollyleaf: WFW. Search your name. Ashfur: (types something in) Fandom sucks. Hollyleaf: I know right? Ashfur: yeah. Can you believe this one person shipped us in a fanfiction called My extremely weird but very touching version of how Ashfur died :D Wow that's long? (Spotty screams again: THAT'S MEEEEEEEEEEE!) (Ashfur throws rock at Spotty in the live audience) (Spotty dies) Rainy:NU SPOTTY! WHERE WILL I GET MY SNAKEXBIRD NOW? (runs over to Spotty) Spotty: ask... Icy. (dies) Rainy: Alright, next we have Sorreltail. Sorreltail: I BECAME PERSONALITY-LESS AFTER I HAD MY KITS! AND I WILL DIE KNOWING THAT!!!!!!! Rainy: Very nice. Now... TIGERSTAR AHHH! (hides under table) Tigerstar: I WILL KILL YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mapleshade: NO I WILL! Hawkfrost: NO I WILL! Rainy: BE QUIET! Waitnoyellingisfun. (everybody yells including Spotty, who came back to life.) Rainy: OK THAT'S ENOUGH! Wait... SPOTTY! (runs over and hugs Spotty) Ok, now we have Squirrelflight. Squirrelflight: I BECAME PERSONALITY-LESS AFTER I HAD MY KITS TOO!!!!!!!!!!! EXCEPT MY KITS WERE FAKE!!!!! Spotty: True. True. Rainy: Now Ashfoot. Ashfoot: you're a lot nicer than Poppyfrost. She was racist. Rainy: thankies! c: now, Firestar. Firestar: 2+2=5. Rainy: Even ''I ''know that wasn't right. Firestar: No, I'm the leader of ThunderClan so what I say goes, and you won't argue with me! Rainy: BUT YOU'RE STUPID. :c Whatever, it's time for Tigerheart. Tigerheart: Meow I'm a cute kitten? (big eyes) Dovewing: DAWWWWW Rainy: That is REALLY cute. Now for Whitestorm Whitestorm: IMMA OLD. Rainy: Not really... Whitestorm: I USE MY OLDNESS POWERS TO KILL PEOPLE Rainy: There's no such thing as oldness powers. Whitestorm: OH REALLY? (gives Rainy a moustache) Rainy: okay, maybe there is. AND COOL I HAVE A MOUSTACHE. Whitestorm: you're welcome. Rainy: Okay, now for- WAIT WHERE DID MY MOUSTACHE GO???? Whitestorm: oldness powers have limited affects. Rainy: Awwww.... Whitestorm: jk lol I just used the non-permanent version. (gives Rainy a permanent moustache) Rainy: YAY! Frostfur, any comments on my moustache? Frostfur: It's.... cool. Imma older than you Whitestorm. Whitestorm: MAYBE, BUT DO YOU HAVE OLDNES POWERS? Frostfur: no... (cries in corner) Rainy: That was mean D: Anyway, Tawnypelt? Tawnypelt: IMMA KILL CHU. INCLUDING MY FATHER AND KITS. Rainy: O.O very... inthusiastic, Tawnypelt. Snowfur? Snowfur: (turns down iPod) what was that, Rainy? Rainy: Okay, she's dying first. (Everyone but Snowfur nods in agreement) (Snowfur looks genuinely confused) Snowfur: I'm already dead. Rainy: Yeah, she's getting killed first. (nods) Anyway, Dawnpelt? Dawnpelt: I have a cool name. That is all. Rainy: true. Now, Bumblestripe? Bumblestripe: BUMBLY LUVS CHU. Dovewing: You suck. I might pick you in the actual series, but this TV show is written by a HUMUNGOUS fan of Tigerwing, so yeah. Bumblestripe: Tigerwing? Dovewing: that's her nickname for TigerXDove. Tigerheart: but neither of us is named Nick. Dovewing: IT'S AN EXPRESSION, YOU DONKUS. (slaps Tigerheart, then licks his ear) Rainy: YAY. Now, Brightheart? Brightheart: I IMPOSSIBLY SURVIVED ONCE, I CAN DO IT AGAIN. Rainy: Foxleap? Foxleap: I LUVZ YOU TOO, DOVEWING! Dovewing: Why are all three of the cats who have showed romantic connection to me here? Rainy: good question. Well that wraps up contestant introductions. Cornucopia results #Cinderheart- grenade macaroni, sleeping bag, cobwebs #Dovewing- sword, small supply of fresh-kill #Graystripe- large pack including: fresh-kill, knife, water, moss #Mapleshade- Nothing. But she didn't die. #Hawkfrost- small supply of fresh-kill #Bluestar- Sparkly extra long, sharp, claws and bow and arrows with disco-ball attachments. (DISCO!!!!!) #Ivypool- cake. And pie. And cupcakes. c: #Ferncloud- Died. Instantly. #Hollyleaf- extra-claw-iness claw attachments #Ashfur- knife #Sorreltail- fresh-kill supply #Tigerstar- See 'Mapleshade'. #Squirrelflight- See 'Graystripe' #Ashfoot- See 'Mapleshade' #Firestar- Sparkly crown with extendable weapons xD #Tigerheart- See 'Mapleshade' #Whitestorm- See 'Mapleshade' #Frostfur- See 'Mapleshade' #Tawnypelt- knife #Snowfur- Nothing but miraculously survived :D #Dawnpelt- See 'Mapleshade' #Bumblestripe- See 'Mapleshade' #Brightheart- See 'Graystripe' #Foxleap- See 'Graystripe' Sorry for all the 'See blank's but I'm lazy c: Daily updates (also featuring Rainy as well.) Poppyfrost: I'm back! That was really fast surgery. Anyway, Cinderheart is hiding in a dip in the ground with her sleeping bag, throwing Grenade Macaroni at all living things passing. She has a large pile of prey and has only used one box of Grenade Macaroni. She got all ten boxes that were at the cornucopia. So far she has not needed to use her cobwebs. (Snowfur walks up to Cinderheart) Cinderheart: WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE! BRACE YOURSELF FOR MACARONI!!!! Snowfur: Huh?... Cinderheart: (throws Grenade Macaroni) TALK! Snowfur: (barely misses getting exploded) Well, I have no idea what's going on, but when I asked my sister she was like 'YOU CAN'T BE IN AN ALLIANCE WITH ME!!!!!! NU!!!! DISCO!!!!!!!' so can I be in an alliance with you... or something? Cinderheart: NU! YOU ARE GOING TO STEAL MY MACARONI! (Snowfur runs away) Poppyfrost: looks like Cinderheart's doing well, but I might not say the same for Snowfur. Let's check on Dovewing! (cut to Dovewing) Poppyfrost: she seems to be managing well. She's hiding in a tree. Her sword is balanced on a branch below her, so if a threat passes by she can shove it off and retrieve it when all dangers have passed. Although she seems to be having trouble with picking an alliance. Bumblestripe: I LUVS CHU! PICK ME! Foxleap: I HAS ALL THE NECESSITIES AND I WILL SHARE WITH CHU! Tigerheart: Meow I am a cute kitten? (big eyes) Dovewing: GO AWAY BUMBLESTRIPE AND FOXLEAP. I PICK TIGERHEART BECAUSE HE IS ADORABLE. Tigerheart: YAY! (scrambles up tree and curls up next to Dovewing) (Bumblestripe and Foxleap refuse to go away.) (Dovewing drops sword on them) (Foxleap dies and Bumblestripe runs away in terror) Dovewing: Let's go steal his stuff! Tigerheart: YAY! (jumps of branch and picks up pack) Dovewing: Good job! Now bring it here! Tigerheart: OK! (brings pack to Dovewing) Poppyfrost: Looks like she's doing fine with her little minion. How's Graystripe? Let's see. (cut to Graystripe) Poppyfrost: Graystripe has made a nice home for himself. He seems to have burrowed under a tree and settled there. He has made a pool and a nest. He has a small fresh-kill pile and he has his knife hidden away where no cat will see it. Firestar: Can I be in an alliance with you? Graystripe: no. Firestar: Why not? Graystripe: Because you became a jerkish idiot at some time in the series impossible to pinpoint. Firestar: AAWW.... Fine. Graystripe: YAY! Poppyfrost: looks like those two are doing okay. Except Firestar didn't get to be in an alliance. Let's see about Mapleshade. (cut to Mapleshade) Poppyfrost: Mapleshade has already taken out the dark forest competition. (Tigerstar's paw twitches) Poppyfrost: OH! (Tigerstar lies completely still again without breathing) Poppyfrost: AAAWWW. WaitwhyamIAAAWWWinghe'sevil. Mapleshade: VICTORY SHALL BE MINE! (poppyfrost screams and dies) AD BREAK! Darkstripe: CHOCOLATE MAKES CATS DIE. Rainy: Okay you guys, I'm back! (Adoring fans squeal) Rainy: YAY! Let's check in on Bluestar! (Cut to Bluestar pulling out a cellphone) Bluestar: Ya, so I was like, No, I'm like, totalleh not being in an alliance with you, losah. You're gonna be, like, gone in five minutes. Bet shez already dead. DISCO!!!!!! (waits) Bluestar: Ya, I am lucky you still love me even though I'm so weird. DISCO!!!!!!!!! Rainy: yeah, let's get out of here as fast as possible. (cut to Ivypool) Rainy: Ivypool seems to be doing well. She hogged all the pastries, though, so Hollyleaf and Sorreltail are angry! Hollyleaf: GIVE ME CUPCAKES! Ivypool: NO MINE! Hollyleaf: Then give me pie. Ivypool: (fluffs tail around all the pastries) NU MINE! Sorreltail: Then give some to me. Ivypool: NU! (kills Sorreltail in one blow) Hollyleaf: Oh, it's on. (Hollyleaf leaps towards Ivypool and bites at her scruff) Ivypool: MY... CUPCAKES! (pins Hollyleaf down and claws her ears) Hollyleaf: I don't want to kill you, Ivypool. Hand over half of your cupcakes or else. Ivypool: Like you could kill me. Hollyleaf: You're right... the cupcakes are yours. (goes limp) Ivypool: That'll teach you. (walks away) (Hollyleaf does some epic flippy thing and jumps on Ivypool's back) Ivypool: huh? Hollyleaf: Never mess with someone bigger than you, little girl. Hand over the cupcakes or else. Ivypool: NU! Hollyleaf: fine. (scratches at Ivypool's neck) Ivypool: FINE! TAKE ALL THE CUPCAKES YOU WANT! Hollyleaf: Actually, I have an even better idea. Let's be the cupcake alliance! Ivypool: Okay! (hugs Hollyleaf) (Hollyleaf licks cherry icing off a chocolate cupcake) (Ivypool licks citrus swirl icing off a vanilla cupcake) Rainy: Yay happy endings! Let's see Ashfur! (cut to Ashfur) Rainy: He seems to be drawing a diagram of how he is to kill Hollyleaf. He has taken refuge in a hollow tree. Ashfur: (muttering to self) So then I'll come over there with my knife and take out any alliance members who might protect her... Rainy: he seems to be doing fine. (cut to Squirrelflight) Rainy: Squirrelflight has made a nice home with some tree stumps, long, thick grass, and brambles. She's using her survival skills. She is keeping well-fed. Nobody is bothering her. Squirrelflight: Ah, it's a pretty day. (absentmindedly throws a knife at a passing squirrel) Rainy: She's doing well. Let's check in on Ashfoot. (cut to Ashfoot) Rainy: Ashfoot is doing quite well. She has made a nice home in an empty grassy area with rocks around it. Ashfoot: OHNU I HOPE I DON'T GET KILLED! (looks scared) Rainy: lawl. Let's see Whitestorm. (cut to gigantic mansion) Rainy: He's used his oldness powers to make a mansion! (cut to inside where he's in front of a big-screen tv watching himself watching himself watching himself...) Rainy: that's a little creepy. (cut to Frostfur knocking on door of mansion) (Whitestorm opens the door) Whitestorm: (british accent) 'ello dahlink. What do you want? Frostfur: TO BE IN AN ALLIANCE WITH CHU! Whitestorm: OK! (farts rainbows that blast him and Frostfur into the sky) Rainy: I don't even want to know what that smells like... let's check on Tawnypelt. Tawnypelt: I CHOPPED CHUR HEAD OFF DAWNPELT. Rainy: O.O Let's go check on Brightheart. (cut to Brightheart) Rainy: okshesdoingfineletsgetoutofhere